Again

Dear journal

We made love again. Call me a whore but I can’t resist his touch. He called me up and wants to meet up from what he told me would be the last time we might see each other again.

I refused at first, because the pain was too much when I see him. He insisted and threatened that we might not see each other again.

I heeded and went at his place.

We watched a movie and sooner he started touching my thighs. I could not fight the feeling anymore. I heeded to his every request.

I wanted him more than ever. The feeling of longing, passion and love seemed escalating with every touch.

I hugged him from behind like I used to do before, I expected he'd be turning towards me and hug me back...

...but he didn't...

I cried...

The man I love just could not love me anymore...

Off

Dear Journal

The past few days have been quiet depressing for me and the frustrating part is that I can’t seem to figure out what makes me feel this way. I’ve opted to seclude myself from my friends for days in order to not direct the stress I feel to them.

I find it hard to sleep again and consequently get late for work.

I still feel the melancholy when I think of him.

The sadness seems unbearable that I lock myself in the comfort room and cry.